65 Nassau St, #10B - $760,000 - 950 sq ft

It feels like forever since we actually posted about a visit to a listing (is that Cyndi Lauper humming 'Time after Time' in the background?) so we decided to actually write a new review, following this reader exchange:

Reader: How come you don't post reviews of listings anymore?
Downtowny: We are lazy as sh*t. There just isn't enough time with all of the great deals out there!

The un lucky apartment is 65 Nassau, #10B a studio makeshift two bedroom (yep, you've heard this one before) in a co-op building on Nassau and John in the Financial District.

Take a look at the picture of the apartment above. Can you actually make anything out amidst the clutter of French mansion furniture, chandeliers, ginormous dining room table and awkward partition? We couldn't either. Even while standing in this unit, it's difficult to figure out exactly what you are looking at in this strange, yet oddly appealing space, due to just the amazing volume of stuff in there combined with some extensive partitioning.

If you can get past the decor, what you basically have is a pretty cool corner loft, with nice large windows, good light and attractive city views. The "bedrooms" are actually both the result of clever partitioning. The master bedroom doesn't have a door (basically, it has two real walls, a closet and then shares a wall with the living room partition), but it feels substantial and removed from the rest of the apartment, has closets and is a decent size. The second "bedroom" is a bit of a joke - basically, the divas people who live here have partitioned the living room in half, building an awkward set of translucent sliding doors right in the middle of the living area, creating a second seating area. Why do you need two whole seating areas in 950 sq ft of space? We don't know either.

A tiny, but well renovated kitchen, one and a half baths (although the half bath is uncomfortably tiled and has a weird circular shower) plus a pretty high maintenance of $1951, complete the rather confusing picture at this apartment that has been on the market for around four months.

The sellers bought this place for $740,000 in July of 2006 and listed it originally at $865,000 just three short months ago in February. At the current listing price of $765,000, this apartment is not even close to priced at our 2003 target, but heading in the right direction.

NYT Mint Condition, Low Miles Condo at 15 Broad St Sold for Way Too Much

Teri wrote a great, insightful article this week about what really matters to buyers - space and low maintenance duh, and not hotel amenity features like libraries and pet spas (sorry Fluffy).

The one thing that really surprised us in this article however, was that Mathieu and Monica Schepard and their adorable little girl actually purchased an 856 sq ft studio loft at 15 Broad for $692,000 and plan on converting the thing to a 2BR (ugh!). Although we have not seen the unit that they purchased, we believe that we saw an identical unit, in this case #928, which (although mildly camouflaged in Streeteasy) has the same square footage as the unit that the Schepard's purchased and is priced similarly to the original asking price for the Schepard's unit of $799,000. #928, which we saw just a couple of weeks ago, has all of the well-documented problems of many new construction lofts in FiDi (one long room with one set of windows, making partitioning particularly challenging, views of a neighboring office building etc.). It is because of problems such as these that we believe that #928 sold for a fairly reasonable $595,000 in May of 2007. Assuming the Schepard's bought a similar unit for $692,000, that cute family is about to pay a 16% premium to the 2007 sales price. What the heck?

CILF of the Week - 15 William St (The William Beaver House)

The Beave as a CILF? Oh, the irony...

We sure had quite a hard time deciding to name this comically undersold development in FiDi as this week's CILF. In addition to all of the press that this Andre Balazs pet project (no pun intended) gets for not being able to sell any darn units, we love reading the oh so snarky coverage of it's black and yellow exterior (we're pretty sure that you can see the Beave from space) as well as the uber sexualized marketing campaign targeted at wealthy wish they were oversexed Wall Streeters.

In reality, when we popped by the Beave today, we saw a truly empty building (yes, all of the rumors are true, as far as we can tell absolutely nobody lives here) even though the sales agent claims that they are 55% sold (whatevs). The common areas were like some kind of weird and empty ghost relics - sort of like discovering a fully intact Titanic underwater. The gym is beautiful, the pool looks good (and full), the roof deck however is not complete (will be done by end of May they tell us - we report, you decide), and the theater is just an under construction room. The outdoor basketball/handball court is huge but also not looking like it's going to be finished anytime soon. We were additionally sad to learn that Balazs has abandoned plans to give the over-the-lobby jacuzzi a glass floor, although we are happy to report that there is a jacuzzi and it does appear to be functional. Plans for the first floor library and restaurant (although depicted in the cool 3-D renderings in the sales office) appear to be on permanent vacation, but that's fine with us, as this building needs to really focus on completing the amenities that have at least been started.

So given the emptiness and the unfinished common areas, why make this a CILF you might ask? It turns out that much to our surprise, the Beaver House actually has really great units. The layouts of the 1BRs that we saw were good, we liked the hardwood floors, and even the oft-panned kitchens were perfectly fine. We like the little built-in murphy offices and thought that many of the features in the apartments made good use of space. In addition, we lust, lust, lust after the enormous tubs (yes, it's sexy to have them open into the bedrooms), a feature that we have not seen in any other development. We also love the in-unit washers and dryers (are you listening 90 William?).

Overall, we think this is a great building. The asking prices however at over $1MM for a 700 sq ft 1 BR are unreasonable bordering on insane way too high for even a nice building in this quiet area of FiDi. We love you though Beave and are curious whether you are going to go the hotel route or the full on rental extravaganza.

90 William St (Be@William)

Although we are instinctively turned off by any development that has special characters in the name ("Be@William", are you a .com?), we were certainly attracted to the low price per sq ft of this well-timed conversion in one of our favorite areas of the Financial District. Because sales started here in 2007, this building managed to avoid the fate of our favorite zombie condo 20 Pine and has actually managed to sell most of it's units.

What's left over however, is tough to be @, as we wandered through dark unit after dark unit wishing that some sun would also be @ William. Five of the listed units (and we think actually more than that) are the ominous "H" line, long, dark units in the back of the building with two tiny windows that each face directly on to a soulless neighboring office building. Although they are priced attractively at under $700 per sq ft, we found it hard to imagine ourselves living in what looks like an Ikea showroom, with the same cheap fixtures and warehouse feel.

The white on white kitchen located inconveniently along a wall in the middle of the unit along with the inability to install a W/D (huh?) annoyed us even further. In fact, when we asked the icy cold Corcoran agent about installing a W/D (a standard question for us, particularly in a new conversion), she responded by saying that the 90% of people who already bought units were "happy without one" (whatever).

On the bright side (literally), it looks like there might be some price movement in the few units that actually are liveable here, namely the gorgeous West-facing 2BR, 2BA "A" line. These units face William St. (the only direction in this building where the sun is @) and we note with some level of excitement that one recently sold for just $875,000. While not a bargain, it's a step in the right direction.

120 Greenwich #12F - $679,900 - 700 sq ft. - our very first viewing is in contract.

Nostalgia abounds for us at this smallish 1BR, 1BA condo. Although we never wrote about this listing in one of our least favorite locations in FiDi, it is the first open house that we ever attended here in New York. Back when we saw it, this apartment was listed at the brazen price of $719,000, and the seller's agent at the time told us that there were "multiple offers" on the unit (ha ha).

So it is with some degree of irony that we note that today, this listing has actually entered into contract, somewhere in the neighborhood (we imagine) of it's most recent ask of $679,900.

So what did we think of the unit? Well...it's kind of small and the detached outdoor space is a turn-off. The location is kind of that West St/FiDi netherworld...not quite the heart of FiDi, not quite Battery Park, on an oddly industrial street surrounded by delivery trucks and highway entrances. We liked the pretty arch windows though and the building was converted very recently (2007).

Good luck to the buyers! We will check back and find out how much this place actually sold for.

55 Liberty St. #21A - $899,000 - 1250 sq. ft.

This apartment is often compared to the other $899,000 listing at 55 Liberty even though these two apartments have a totally different vibe.

#21A is basically a glorified two BR (yes, there is the ubiquitous fake non-weight bearing wall that cleaves the living room in half) albeit with a good layout and fantastic light. The views are spectacular here and actually better than the attic penthouse unit that is also for sale. Since we can take the elevator all the way to this apartment, we kind of prefer it to the PH anyway. The full-size side-by-side washer and dryer in this unit was also so cool that we even forgot how much closet space it takes up.

On the down side, this apartment pretty much needs a full cosmetic renovation (floors, paint, bathrooms etc.). And what the heck is up with the creepy horseshoe shaped "Eat-In" kitchen, which we didn't even want to step all the way into never mind sit down to "eat-in" anything.

55 Liberty Street #PH - $899,000 - 1500 sq ft

As this discussion thread on Streeteasy so adequately demonstrates, high maintenance is the word at this beautiful but oh so inaccessible FiDi penthouse. Although the asking price per square foot is quite reasonable, $3314 in monthly maintenance (huh?) on 1500 sq ft is enough to make anyone balk, particularly given that the co-op building housing this apartment is kind of old and not the amenity-filled wonderland that you would expect for $2+ per sq foot of maintenance.

The other big minus is that despite being on the 32nd floor of an elevator building, this PH is actually a walk-up, requiring occupants to take the elevator to the 30th floor and then walk up 2 flights of stairs.

On the plus side, the apartment is quite cool although we are not fans of the attic-like sloped windows that basically obscure the phenomenal view of the old-school eagle statues and plain old gargoyles that sit on top of the roof of this building. The kitchen here is very pretty, has a small window (which we are suckers for) and has a wine fridge. The living room is huge and the bathrooms are both in fantastic (renovated) condition. Plus, we kind of like the vibe from the down-to-earth seller on the Streeteasy thread.

Although we saw this apartment during the day, one of the things that struck us as we entered this building is that our favorite FiDi bar, the venerable Pound and Pence is located right on the second floor (same entrance as the residents). Is this a plus (drinks in your jammies on rainy days)? A minus (rowdy after-work smokers outside of your building's entrance)? We can't decide....

56 Pine Street, #11F - $685,000 - 756 sq. ft.

We have to admit that we've always had a small crush on 56 Pine. The building has a cool common area, a 421g tax abatement, and does not have the ridiculous financial problems of similarly situated downtown new construction buildings.

We wanted to like this apartment, which we assumed would be selling at somewhat of a discount given it's current status as an "office" for some weird start-up. Although we have heard that buyers are not able to use their imaginations, we never believed it until we walked into this apartment. It was certainly hard to remove the four huge desks in the living room out of our little minds as we tried instead to picture, say a couch and a TV. The bedroom wasn't any easier, as we tried to mentally unclutter away piles of folders and a small chaise lounge.

Overall, this apartment is probably bigger than it feels and seemed like a solid purchase to us. Although $685K is at least near the zip code of something approaching a reasonable price, we think this apartment is far from cheap enough to actually get an offer within say, 20% of the ask.

We still love you 56 Pine and think that you might be one of the few all-owner new construction condos left standing after all of this shakes out.

176 Broadway #8E - $699,000 - 1225 sq ft

Much confusion abounds regarding this odd 2BR, 2BA listing in FiDi that seems seriously underpriced at only $570 per sq ft. What is this, 2001?

Well it turns out that this listing has many layers of excitement, starting with the fact that originally, #8E was being offered along with the neighboring unit, which is connected by a locked door. When the owner of #8E (and the neighboring unit) decided only to sell #8E, the price of the apartment dropped dramatically. Unfortunately, good old Sotheby's decided to drag their feet on updating the other pieces of the listing and forgot to mention that this apartment (instead of being a 2BR, 2BA) is actually a 1BA studio.

In case you are confused about this, Sotheby's actually offered us an imaginary ideal floorplan of the apartment indicating what it "could look like" were it to actually be the apartment that we thought we were going to see.

After getting over the intial shock and the Sotheby's shenanigans, we proceeded to view this studio, which is well-maintained but is really just an enormous living room and a mirrored dining area. The kitchen is updated but the apartment has a very 1940s sort of feel to it, with gilded/mirrored everything. Even the sub-zero had some kind of surface that we're pretty sure parties like it's 1945 when no one is looking.

When we asked about a W/D in the unit, we had the following conversation with Sotheby's:

Downtowny: Is there a W/D in the unit?
Crazy Sotheby's broker: No, but there's a dryer on this floor...but no washer.
Downtowny: (biting tongue) So...are there floors that have washers but no dryers?
Crazy Sotheby's broker: Yes.

"As If!" (The Overpriced Apartment of the Week) - 324 Pearl St. #2J - $800,000 - 825 sq. ft.

This week's winner was a no-brainer, although the apartment in the ghetto on Avenue D that we saw was a mild contender. In FiDi, this 1BR, 1BA's block is our absolute least favorite. The apartment is on Pearl, basically right next to the FDR. Yes, you can walk 5-10 minutes and reach a better part of the FiDi or even the South Street Seaport (who wants to go there anyway?), but essentially this location is like living on an on-ramp.

The apartment itself is quite dark, with one tiny window in the living room (no opportunity to create another window) and a bigger (but still too small) window in the good-sized bedroom. There is no W/D in the apartment but the kitchen is renovated. We liked the vaguely S&M details in the apartment (think old chain links) left over from when this building was a book bindery, but none of it makes up for the nasty location and the dark, other buildings view. We're thinking $550K.

71 Nassau Street #7D - $895,000 - 830 sq. ft.

We like to believe in the best of listings, but this apartment felt way less than 830 square feet to us. Closer to 750 or less. The apartment is renovated and attractive - with beautiful blonde wood floors and a great kitchen. The view from the living room isn't terrible - a mix of buildings and beyond. Good closet space etc. but overall, the unit felt awfully small.

The iron beam in the living room is certainly distinctive and we definitely appreciated the presence of a W/D. I would look for this unit to decrease in price dramatically over the next few months as it is quite small and the particular block on Nassau is a smokeshop/diner/New York & Company extravaganza.

1 Wall Street Court #1309 - $899,000 - 949 sq. ft.

Ah, the Cocoa Exchange. This 2 BR has 45 John Street written all over it. Cramped living room at the expense of two reasonably sized bedrooms. Views of the building across the street really complete the picture here.

Not a bad building (what, with a Haru downstairs, how could it be terrible?), although still seems overpriced. The pictures make it look larger, but there is only so much you can do with 949 square feet and a true 2 BR (which this place is).

20 Pine Street, #1006 - $799,000 - 1,070 sq ft.

Ah, 20 Pine, how we lust after
you. This building has such a cool vibe. The beautiful dark wood floors, "W Hotel" like fixtures and ambience, plus the New York Stock Exchange views in the unit that we saw almost made us forget about the terrible financial problems that have been plagueing this building for the last 6 months.

But...although we would like to imagine ourselves 20 pounds thinner and 6 inches taller as we strut around these magical units, we can't help but be reminded that there are 55 units for sale on Streeteasy.com and that the building recently tried to sell these units plus more at rack rate to a VC (or whoever else can pony up).

Would we like to buy here one day? You bet your Armani slippers we would. Would we buy here today? I guess su Casa is not mi Casa.

45 John Street

We visited 45 John Street a couple of weeks ago. They still have the "model" 7th floor, where you can walk around and see apartments with a variety of floorplans that will (one day) become available on higher floors.

Overall, we thought this building was daaaark. Dark. Dark. There was only one layout (the tiny 589sq ft corner "A" line) that we saw that had any natural light at all. Believe it or not, this was our favorite unit on the 7th floor (because of the light). Unfortunately, the kitchen was in the tiny living room (pasta sauce spatter on the couch anyone?) and the bedroom was a prison cell at 10'x8'. The other apartments definitely had larger bedrooms at the expense of the living room (not our ideal) and were basically pitch black at 1PM on a sunny day.

Combine that with <50% sold and we're thinking no way. If you want to take a financial risk in this area, 20 Pine has much nicer layouts and District is beautiful.

District, The Movie

I have to admit that when we finally saw District yesterday (that sexy building on the remarkably unsexy Fulton Street), we were mildly turned on. We saw two beautiful apartments, with cool kitchens, very high ceilings and big windows. Not even the inevitable views of the building across the street changed our minds about the pretty apartments.

The amenities are pretty much complete (the pool is filled, the upstairs roof deck looks better than the pictures, the media room is done, and the spa and gym are very, very cool). Despite this building's well-documented financial problems, we were quite tempted.

All of this despite the Developer's vaguely mysoginistic, porn-tastic ad campaign which culminates in perhaps the worst movie that I have ever seen created by a professional. I wonder how much they paid per square minute for this shaky beauty shot by a handheld (huh?) camera. Is that the Odeon in the background?